- A man found out his wife is the owner of the house they have been living in for more than five years
- He is torn by the realisation and seeks solution on how best and most practical approach to all of this
- Victory Wilson, an expert and psychologist offers a fresh perspective to the issue with a practical response
An anonymous asked:
“I found out my wife is the owner of the rental house we live in. This was a painful realisation yet I am caught in a dilemma. Should I continue paying rent, divorce her or confront her for keeping it a secret?”
Keeping secrets can affect trust, create communication gaps, and lead to misunderstandings.
The stress of harboring secrets can strain the relationship and increase anxiety for the secret-keeper.
Source: Getty Images
Resentment may grow over time, weakening the marital bond and unity. Manipulation through secrets can be damaging and is viewed negatively.
Wilson provides an answer on the man’s question about his wife’s secrecy.
Victory Wilson is a Psychologist with over 5 years of experience on marital conversations and issues.
First things first
I would advise them to sit down and have a candid conversation about it. It is going to be a difficult conversation to have but it is a starting point towards an amicable solution.
Implication moving forward
From a psychological point of view, the implication of what the wife did is that the trust in the relationship has been broken to a point where it is hard to redeem. The best avenue for the trust to be revived in the relationship is if there is a strong reason for the woman to heed that from her husband.
After having the needed conversation, if they do not reach an amicable agreement, they could take it a step further by scheduling a session with a therapist.
Can both party decide to stay in the marriage?
Such marriage can continue. There are several incidents where the worst have happened and the couple weather the storm, trials and came back together stronger. All in all, the success of this marriage moving forward depends, first, on how well they are able to discuss this and arrive at an amicable solution with or without a therapist. First, they need to understand the attributes that inspired the woman’s secrecy. The “why” needs to be convincing to the husband, this is very important.
If there is no cogent why, the husband may be left with no choice but to move out of the marriage, sadly. This may be the best solution as failure to do this may lead to unimaginable abuse in the marriage. A marriage where there is no trust needs not continue. I hope this helps.
My marriage is falling apart, what can I do?
Meanwhile, Legit.ng previously reported that a married man is unhappy that his marriage is falling apart and wants to make it work again.
He indicates that his love for his wife is no longer the same and seeks an urgent solution that will lead to lasting impact.
Ola Moses, a relationship expert with 5 years of experience, advises him and gives him a detailed solution.
Source: Legit.ng
